Letters to… Amanda Todd, the Weak, and the Strong.

When I was a kid, I bullied. I was short and fat and our family didn’t have a lot of money, so hand-me-down clothes were the norm. All of this happened in grade school. Once I hit high school, I was left alone, thanks for my growth spurt and avoiding social activities. I had a handful of good friends that, fortunately, I still call my friends to this day. But grade school was when my being bullied was at its peak.

The fortunate thing for me was that, when I went home, I was free from bullying. Kids today, especially those on social media, aren’t free from bullying. The bullies find them online and harass them constantly. If they had the internet back when I was in grade school, or even high school, I might not have made it out. I might have ended up like Jamie Hubley or Amanda Todd, or one of the hundreds of kids who died before bullying gained national attention.

I usually write letters in a sarcastic tone, or in the form of a rant. But today, I want to express my feeling on the following…

Dear “The Strong”;

Nope, I’m not talking to the jocks and natural leaders among the kids and teens out there. I’m talking about the ones who struggle just to get through everyday. These are the kids and teens who aren’t wearing the coolest fashions, or have to newest electronics, or aren’t what others would consider “cool”. They are the real “strong” ones, especially when they are mocked and bullied because of their differences.

I want to tell them that these years can be so hard and dreadful. But they are not the be-all and end-all of their lives. Grade school and high school ends. One way or another, they’ll move on. The things that happened back then will only be remembered by the pathetic people who are desperate to hold onto the past because they aren’t prepared for the future. More often than not, the popular ones in grade and high school go on to very ordinary lives that they usually don’t like because they hold on to their glory days, instead of making new ones,

Those that are bullied, that were different, have a head-start on many of those popular people. You know how difficult life can be. You are already strong, and can deal with the crap life throws at you. You have a greater chance of making something of yourself, whether it be financial and/ or personal.

But before you can do all that, you have to face the hardship of grade school and high school bullying, puberty, and social awkwardness, among other things. Speaking as an adult, life is hard. But if you can get through being a kid and a teenager, if you can build your internal and external strength, then you’ll be ready to face the world after high school. Even though life is hard, there are great things out there. Wonderful things. Beautiful things.

If you are being bullied and are afraid of tomorrow. That’s understandable. But never, NEVER let that fear rule you. The best way to defeat the bullies is to never let them win. They can beat you, mock you, but as long as you keep going, then they’ll never win. After all, bullies are just stupid people using stupid words to make their stupid little lives seem better. Their lack of compassion and understanding of things and people who may be different may stay with them all their lives.

That is what all this is about, life. Living. Like I said, grade school and high school isn’t forever. When it’s done, you really begin to live life.

Sincerely,

Mark (aka Sarcasticus Rex)

 

Dear “The Weak”;

The “Weak” are the bullies and cyber-bullies. I’d call you cowards, but you’re worse than cowards. You are pathetic excuses for beings that must be so miserable in your life that you have to spread the misery around.

Back in the day, you did this in school. But now, you stalk social media because you are so afraid of the world that the only way you can make yourself feel more important is my ruining someone else’s life. The bullies back in my day at least did it to my face. They were stupid and childish, but they weren’t as afraid as the cyber-bullies.

I’d blame the kids or their parents for raising dispassionate, amoral heathens, but it’s not just kids that bully other kids. A 32-year-old man was identified as the alleged blackmailer and tormentor of Amanda Todd. Another man made derogatory comments on Amanda Todd’s memorial Facebook page. Sadly, sickos come in all ages. But at least some kids and teens have a chance to turn their lives around, via their parents and counselling. That is, if their parents even know what their little brats are doing, which many don’t.

I consider myself an objective and compassionate person. I try to understand the other side before out-right condemning. But I’m hard-pressed to have any sympathy for these people who do evil onto others for whatever reason. Do they think it’s fun? Are they lashing out for some slight society has brought upon them? Or are they just heads full of bad wiring? Either way, I’m beginning to not care what their reasons are. Too many lives have been extinguished because of vermin that feel the need to relentlessly bully others. These are the kinds of people, regardless of age, that I would apply that Christian adage “an eye for an eye.”. I would like to see their lives put up for display, for all to see. I’d like to see them embarrassed to the point of humiliation. But instead of letting them kill themselves, make them live with the memory of their own cruelty. Maybe then they’d understand. If they didn’t the first time, repeat as often as necessary.

Enough young people have died because of other’s apathy and indifference.

Sincerely,

Mark

 

Dear Amanda;

I wish someone could have said the right words to you to make you change your mind.

But who knows what those words were? Speaking from experience, when the world overwhelms you, it’s hard to hear those words, any words, that might help. Everything is so dark and hopeless, that death is a release. I understand that. Completely.

We have all done stupid things we wish we could take back. I know I have. If I had some of those mistakes repeated again and again, for all the world to see, I’m not sure what I would have done. I might have done what you did.

But I didn’t, and I’m thankful. Only time and experience have made me realize how terrible suicide at such a young age would have been. You didn’t get that chance to realize how important your life could have been. Age and experience might have lessened the cruelty and embarrassment of those pictures and those stupid people’s words. That’s what they were, just stupid people’s words. They didn’t know the real you. The sad thing, now no one will.

I didn’t know you in life. I still don’t know you in death. But you remind me of those I used to know as a kid, and kids that I’ve had the pleasure to know as an adult; nieces, nephews, their friends, and friend’s kids.  Your YouTube video showed a creative, passionate soul. You were probably a shy but sweet girl. I imagine a laugh that could be surprisingly loud. Maybe you wanted to act, be a singer, those things I’d only be guessing at.

But because of stupid people’s words and actions, no one, especially your family and your true friends, will ever know the truth.

I wish someone could have said the right thing to change your mind.

Hopefully, these words, and others, will be the right things that will change someone else’s mind.

Sincerely,

Mark